Growing growing and growing! This little boy is going to be one big baby I think.
I'm so big! He's so strong! I have felt him since around 18 weeks even 15 weeks, little flutters here and there but wow at 22 weeks he's super strong. Pushes the remote when I place it on my belly, you can now actually see my belly moving and he's right up by my belly button. Not that I compare but we didn't see my belly moving like this with Kyla for ages, it panics me a little, but I know this is my second pregnancy so you do feel them earlier and its a boy so maybe he's just more active or stronger I'm not sure.
Anxiety levels are still here but this week especially with feeling him move often during the day have helped calm my nerves.
We took a big step and decided to go ahead and move our angels room around and make it our rainbow baby's room, shared with his angel sister but its his room.
I was a wreck thinking about changing things but we decided to go for it, so hubby painted one wall a gorgeous blue and we put some sticker decal on, and it looks so cool.
Walking in there now feels refreshing, it feels like it should be this way...which is weird.
Of course when it comes to hanging his clothes up and things I'm finding that difficult...is it too soon? shall we wait right till the end.... But I know there is no right time & I cant think that way.
He's ok right now so yes! I still haven't done it though.
Week 23
Ouch :( my belly is so big already and its causing me so many aches and pains, my hips hurt, my sides ache when sleeping on them, I'm sure I have pelvic griddle or whatever you call it!
Why do I feel guilty for complaining about this.... Its not the baby its just its hard and uncomfortable but that's ok, ill put up with anything as long as this little man gets here healthy that's all the matters.
So this week I had my MW appointment, and I was right this baby well my belly is measuring a few weeks ahead, so he's a big baba! They are sending me for the Glucose test next month the 2 hour one just to check its not diabetes, fingers crossed that's not the case and he's just big! He's getting stronger and stronger by the time I'm 30 weeks these kicks and hits are going to hurt haha! He is way above my belly button now aswell!
I feel really pregnant, heavily pregnant! Nearly 6 months so yey!!
Another big step we did this week, was getting our little girls things out and going through her clothes looking for all those natural colours to see what we could use. Luckily I found some things but not much. It was so hard looking at all these beautiful unworn girly clothes, knowing Kyla should have been in them! Instead they are in a sealed bag, packed away. I don't think I can ever bring myself to sell them. Then we had the cots sets and the bouncer/bean bag all the bigger things that are pink, these we don't have room for, so I had to move them on. Extremely hard steps to take.
And of course it scares the crap out of me, I cant stop those thoughts creeping in, the mind thinking this could happen again, you could be selling these buying new blue things and you just don't know if this time it will be ok either, this is where I stop on moving forward with this rainbow baby, can I put myself and my hubby through this pain again....what if....what if....what if, No never I cant, we cant deal with anything going wrong!
But I have to move forward and try to carry on with some innocence, I have to do it for my boy. He deserves it.
So I plan to start and hang some things up in the next few weeks, and the image of Kyla's things hanging there stuck in time need to be put away, this little baby will be wearing the things I hang, I'll make sure of it!
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